The upside of my daughter being away on vacation is that I can move the stool that she uses to shit in the toilet tank:
I usually trip over the thing late at night when I am trying to be quiet, but now I can move it out of the way; I don’t have the balance to not fall in. Sometimes, I bang my head on the towel rack (not shown) while I adjust to keep my testicles (also not shown, but for different reasons) from sinking into the water. We keep the nets in the cabinet.
The downside is that I miss her… and the drinks she makes me. I cut up my gums pretty badly last night on an empty whiskey bottle, and I forgot the recipe she gave me for ice. I hope her friends appreciate her company as much as I do.
—DG
Inside Doug's Head 