I recently watched the Netfrix series, Dear Child, or Dumme Kinder, as it is known in German, and here is my Monday morning middle school book report on said series.
I watched it, so you don’t have to. No spoilers.
The conclusion becomes obvious at 12:00 of episode 2. Even the polizei could have figured it out.
Hmm? That’s an interesting detail. Should we follow it up and look into it further? Nah. It’s nothing. The South African chick pretending to be a German investigator will figure it out for us. Let diversity lead us to the solution!.
In the meantime, give me another one of those cliche empty coffee cups actors pretend to drink so I can talk about useless nothings; we gotta drag this nonsense out for enough episodes to get a second season.
It’s international, dubbed and subbed, so it’s intelligent and cheap. Outsourced and discounted disappointment.
There should have been a vampire. Just to keep the audience interested. No one ever suspects a Spanish vampire.
As expected from a post WWE German crime drama, the plot is so obvious and the investigators soooo dumb, it insists upon itself! What a shame such a great premise will inevitably be better executed by more capable storytellers. Or, has it been done better already… I believe it has!
This series is yet another justification for why I am planning on canceling Netflix. It’s not the alphabet people, it’s the overall poor quality content.
Minimum required char. met
Peace out, bitches!
—DG
Inside Doug's Head 