One morning a few days ago, as I was waking up but still sleeping and stuck in a dream, I dreamed that I was watching a group of vintage old timey people play croquet on a large grass field.
One morning a few days ago, as I was waking up but still sleeping and stuck in a dream, I dreamed that I was watching a group of vintage old timey people play croquet on a large grass field.
Have you ever noticed that the people who talk the loudest have the least important things to say? You know, those people having the conversation at the restaurant or diner, or in the parking lot outside your window, who sound as if they are yelling at each other, but they are really talking about the …
At the event of his 80th birthday, George Burns (this happened after he was God, but before he died) declared that he felt the same at 80 as he did when he was 17, which tells us what a pathetic 17 year old he was, and then everyone in the audience laughed; it was back …
Whenever friends or family are leaving after visiting me, I always say to them, “drive careful.” I know it should be, drive carefully, but I like the casual informality the grammatical irregularity creates—be careful. Still, I wonder if as they are driving home, they ever think to themselves, “I could recklessly run that yellow light …
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about time travel. If I were to invent only one thing in my lifetime, I want that one thing to be a time traveling machine. Unfortunately, I already know I don’t invent one, because the first thing I would do with it would be to go back in time …
Inside Doug's Head 