Inside Doug's Head

I am not a number, I am… What's that stuff they make glue out of? I'm that. Forever swirling, forwards and upwards, but always sticky. Sometimes, a little sad.

I went to BevMo today to pick up supplies for the J4 weekend. For some reason, the guy who takes my money, while eyeing my selection of whiskeys, asked me if I needed a case of water. Since I take my whiskey neat, the only neat thing about me, I politely declined. Then he asked me if I wanted a coffee, for the road. I again declined, because it was after 6pm and I wasn’t traveling very far. Reflecting internally as I was walking out the door, I was feeling a little judged. Hey, he’s the guy selling the stuff, he should be grateful I like to buy in volume.

When I go to the potato store, they just say, “Thanks. Have a nice day.” They never look at me and say, “That’s a lot of carbohydrates… Do you want some protein to go with that? No? You should probably put some potatoes back.”

Goddammit Greg! I told you not to take a part time job at BevMo!


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