Inside Doug's Head

What’s Inside the Box?

Doug Godsoe

June 28, 2013

OK, I will admit that my abnormal and underdeveloped brain is confounded by a great many simple things. I can never remember which side of the sink the hot water tap is on, the inner workings of a doorknob mystify me, and I am always surprised when actors appear in new movies after they are killed off in a previous one. Today, I have been giving deep thoughts to expressions that confuse me, along with a bunch of other nonsensical questions that have been taking up space in my head. Let me begin with, thinking outside of the box.

Job Interviews: Beyond the Ten Tips

Doug Godsoe

1 comment

June 26, 2013

With great regularity I see articles published in student newspapers written by some idiot pretending to offer the next generation of college job seekers a leg up on their competition with a list of little known tips for mastering the job interview. These lists are ladened with gems and nuggets of employment seeking wisdom such as, dress appropriately, and look them in the eye when you shake their hand. To which, I would add, don’t stink, brush your teeth, take the aluminum foil off your head, and try not to throw poop at the interviewer. Unless you are interviewing with a deep sea salvage operation, leave your scuba gear at home. Duh? What people really need are the ten interview tips that don’t include the obvious social atrocities.

How Hard Can it be to Write a Good Movie?

Doug Godsoe

no comments

June 20, 2013

I used to think that you had to be at least a tiny bit smart to be able write a movie, but clearly that is not the case. Judging from the crap I see on Netflix (my theme for this month), I am amazed that movie writers are able to feed themselves. When I say feed themselves, I am not speaking metaphorically for a minimal economic success; I mean literally. They must be so stupid that it is remarkable that they can raise a fork to their face and cram a wad of mashed potatoes into their talking hole without stabbing themselves in the eye. I expect that eventually all the dumb ones would starve to death, and what will be left are only the ‘A’ writers and the great screenplays they write. Some limousine-liberal must be taking pity on them and having their servants feed them, for the bad movie situation seems like it is not ending anytime soon. You see? This is what happens when we interfere with nature. Please do not feed the typing monkeys!

Television Commercials I Would Like to See

Doug Godsoe

2 comments

June 14, 2013

Television commercials are becoming increasingly and annoyingly abstract. We see cars driving along with strings on them advertising financial services, dogs running through the woods advertising car batteries, and sheep in a field advertising Old navy. The advertising agencies must think they are being clever in their obtuseness, but they continue to miss the point. Commercials should not leave us with the sense of, that was neat, but what product was it for? Even more disturbing, is the rash of talking babies in commercials. Personally, I never take investing advice from babies; they are only good at pooping in their pants, so why would I ever believe one who is telling me to sign up for an e-trade account?