Inside Doug's Head

I am not a number, I am… What's that stuff they make glue out of? I'm that. Forever swirling, forwards and upwards, but always sticky. Sometimes, a little sad.

For a long time, now, I thought that Neil Patrick Harris and Neil deGrasse Tyson were the same person. They are both named Neil, and their names both sound the same in terms of syllables and iambic feet (I don’t really know what kind of animal an iambic is, but mentioning its feet seems to be an important part of the artistic literary review process).

Sadly, I learned today that NPH and NDT are not one and the same. They are, in fact, two distinctly different people. In retrospect, I should have known this truth all along, since Neil deGrasse Tyson is two inches taller than Neil Patrick Harris. How stupid of me for not noticing sooner. They are not even related, despite having the same first name.

To make matters worse, I have just been informed by a reliable source that Steve Irwin was not Crocodile Dundee.

The world, it is a changing. I don’t know if I can keep up.

–DG.

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