Babies are so stupid they poop in their pants. They don’t even try to make it to a toilet, they just sit there and poop themselves. Then they cry that they pooped themselves and expect an adult to clean them up. If you were to release 60,000 babies into a corn field, you could come …
Who, what, when, where, and why? Wine, whiskey, www, Wally, and whiskey. There’s one more. Wait. That’s it, wait! Wait for way more whiskey! I stand corrected. What are you looking at? Nose face! FYI, lesbians hate it when you smell their faces. You know, because of reasons. —DG.
Maybe it’s an oversight on the part of the Internet police, but I don’t think anyone is paying attention to the comments on YouTubers videos. They should be censored, but they are not. So, if you make a controversial video, it will be removed, but if you make a controversial comment on a banal video, …
Ok, so I just realized that whiskey is not a hydrator. Drinking whiskey while working out makes you even more thirsty. The time passes quickly, but you tend to get rather parched and in need of a nap. You know, in case you were thinking of taking a bottle of Jameson with you to the …
Liposuction: it means fat sucking. DIY liposuction involves using the turkey baster attachment on your vacuum cleaner to extract the fat from your waist and thighs. No exercise required. The only easier way for me to lose 20 pounds of ugly fat would be to cut off my head. Instead of Fight Clubbing the sucked …
Inside Doug's Head 