Blame evolution for making it the drug it is today. As a human, whenever you do something that increases your chances of survival into the next generation of ambidextrous bipedal monkeys, your brain gives you a little hit of something wonderful as a reward.
Maybe I am stupid. Okay, I am definitely stupid, never claimed to be otherwise. I thought the reason we drank a Bloody Mary after a night of hard drinking was to help us sober up.
Please, use caution and think of the children. My children. Excuse me while I run over yours. I have places to be, and your children are homely. Ugly. Grotesque. I wrapped bacon around it and the dog still won’t play with it.
Imagine you have the hiccups. Probably from drinking. One every two seconds. Hiccup. Hiccup. There’s nothing you can do about it. Holding your breath. Sugar under your tongue. Slow breathing while staring at a Pamela Anderson Playboy centerfold. Hiccup. Hiccup. Hiccup. 1989. Hiccup. I still have a copy. Hiccup. Hiccup. In a box… hiccup… in …
There are several reasons that corn is not a global dominant species. Some of them might surprise you. Especially #4, so be sure to watch to the end, and click the like and subscribe button to be notified of new and darkly sad content.
Inside Doug's Head 