When I was a kid, I used to love staying up late. After all of the domineering family members were in bed, I’d sneak downstairs and watch whatever I wanted on the two channels our broadcast television receiver could intercept. Peace, quiet, and self determination, and maybe a snack. Life was marvelous!
There once was a farmer who was trying to sell a horse. He put an ad in Craig’s List: Horse for sale, low mileage, no health issues.
Blame evolution for making it the drug it is today. As a human, whenever you do something that increases your chances of survival into the next generation of ambidextrous bipedal monkeys, your brain gives you a little hit of something wonderful as a reward.
Please, use caution and think of the children. My children. Excuse me while I run over yours. I have places to be, and your children are homely. Ugly. Grotesque. I wrapped bacon around it and the dog still won’t play with it.
Rubber gloves are not just about clean toilets, dishes, hot water, and caustic oven cleaners. They are also great for vulgar crimes and getting away with murder. It’s about fingers in latex, and decided choices before the police arrive. It was an accident! He slipped and fell on the knife… twice.
Inside Doug's Head 