Inside Doug's Head

I am not a number, I am… What's that stuff they make glue out of? I'm that. Forever swirling, forwards and upwards, but always sticky. Sometimes, a little sad.

Or Brad Pitt. Yes; they are equivalent, and mostly interchangeable. The thing is, I would really like to be able to smite those who deserve to be smoten, and if I were an APDE, I could do that quite easily, but if I were Brad Pitt, I wouldn’t need to.

Infinite knowledge, wisdom from the depths of time, or really great bone structure and a gentleman’s agreement with the Universe that the fundamental rules, like gravity and time, don’t apply to me. Either way, it would be a sweet deal.

Walking into or out of every situation with the confidence of knowing that you could end the existence of anyone around you, that would be pretty cool, but even Brad Pitt has limited powers outside of Hollywoodland. I think… and therefore Brad Pitt is. Cogito, ergo Brad Pitt.

For now, the best I can do is let everyone know that I am like Benjamin Button, except in reverse: I started out real, and became more CGI as time went by.


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