You know how ostriches, when they want to hide from reality, bury their heads in the sand? It’s not true, but it’s where the expression comes from. Somebody saw an ostrich looking for a contact lens in the sand, and immediately assumed they were hiding from something, or up to no good and didn’t want …
May contain scenes of violence, sexuality, fowl language about ducks and chickens, prolonged gratuitous nudity for fun, sexual situations involving horses, graphic moral debasment of an adorable midget wearing a posh suit, meandering geriatric stories about onion prices during the Crimean War, drug use, suicide, and smoking. Wait, what? Smoking? Really? I was all-in until …
Recent personal events have me thinking about stuff, like how many witches were burned to death during the Salem Witch trials of 1962? None. It was in 1692, dummy. Okay, how many witches were burned to death in Salem in 1692? The smartasses in the room smugly state that they were all hanged. The actual …
For the Lord sayeth to Benjamin, “Be wary of those who would signal their virtue for the sake of moral superiority; them sons of bitches would rather be politically correct than actually successful, and they will diminish you and your good works.” Not a real quote from any bible or testament of any religion recognized …
Inside Doug's Head 