To turn left. If you’re a man with a history of failure, you have the right to identify as a woman, moving to a place where the bar for athleticism has been lowered for obvious reasons of biology. You have that right… apparently. Should you choose to accept it?
Imagine you have the hiccups. Probably from drinking. One every two seconds. Hiccup. Hiccup. There’s nothing you can do about it. Holding your breath. Sugar under your tongue. Slow breathing while staring at a Pamela Anderson Playboy centerfold. Hiccup. Hiccup. Hiccup. 1989. Hiccup. I still have a copy. Hiccup. Hiccup. In a box… hiccup… in …
So here’s the thing I discovered that you can press the little microphone button down by the keyboard and somewhere some geniuses or something call listen to what it is that you’re saying, and they will type it in as if you actually looked at all the letters and said yeah that’s what I want …
Or Brad Pitt. Yes; they are equivalent, and mostly interchangeable. The thing is, I would really like to be able to smite those who deserve to be smoten, and if I were an APDE, I could do that quite easily, but if I were Brad Pitt, I wouldn’t need to.
Inside Doug's Head 